I'd like to thank the Academy...and H____ R____...

In case you were wondering, the difference between an American seder and an Israeli one is that the latter is much, MUCH faster.  After much (little) deliberation, I came to the startling (obvious) conclusion that this Seder-on-Speed phenomenon is due to Israelis' fluency in Hebrew.  Can you believe it??  So could I.  בקיצור, The Hebrew Factor (as it will henceforth be called) enabled a lightening-speed reading of the "Maggid" section of the Seder--you know, the section that usually takes Americans/Canadians/pick-your-"ans" hours to plow through.  Now, since I know that you are curious, I will tell you what you are all dying to know: yes, I did take a turn reading from the Haggadah, and yes, it was from the section that I learned with my class for Perelman's Model Seder in third or fourth grade.  Ever thought that the Model Seder served no earthly purpose?  Well, you were wrong.  It was because of those weeks and weeks of grueling practice with H_____ R______, going over and over again the words "Raban Gam-li-el haya omer...--it's a mercha there, class, not a munach!" that I was able to avoid embarrassment at the speed with which I generally read previously unseen paragraphs of Rabbinic Hebrew.  Thanks to the Model Seder, I was able to stand my ground, the lone American at a table of Israelis.  H______ R______, out of sheer gratitude for all that you have apparently given me, I promise that I will never again recall the anecdote about the time my classmates put chalk on your chair at the front of the classroom when you weren't looking, so that when you sat down you would have chalk on your butt.  Never again.